Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Paint and misc

"There is paint cans and misc. solvents and the like up for grabs...would prefer you take it all."

There are only three things that you’re less likely to get rid of on the Free Stuff section than "paint cans and misc. solvents." They are, in addition to being useless, heavy, and difficult to lawfully dispose of, a crime to be found in possession of:

1. a broken Jacuzzi, filled with used motor oil and a human corpse,

2. an Ikea sleeper sofa, poorly reupholstered with the hide of an illegally poached Bengal tiger, and

3. a rusted 1970s-era RV with brown appliances and a leaky roof, inhabited by fugitive ex–Gestapo chief Heinrich Müller (MUST TAKE ALL OR NONE, U HAUL!!).