Wednesday, July 23, 2008


Free metal

Free metal? ALRIGHT! Just let me put on some corpsepaint and grab my Viking helmet and I’ll be right—

…on the sidewalk in front of 6664 lombard dr.

On the sidewalk, huh? Okay. I kinda like it, actually. Street mob–style. Afterward we can all go torch a church together, since we’re already outside.

first come first serve

So does that mean it’s like festival seating or what? I guess that’s cool. As long as I can get close enough to get sprayed with stage blood.

Wait, what is that? There’s a barbecue and some pipes where my free metal is supposed to go down. Someone needs to get that crap out of the way, or there won’t be any room for the decorative battle axes and severed pig heads. Seriously. Move your junk. I want my free metal.


imnotsam said...

HAHA! If I was as funny as you, I would be more famous probably.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if opening a forum to share these would be ultimately a good thing or a bad thing:

Anonymous said...

Metal is worth money....

FreshHell said... - free microwave. vintage.

Mariah said...

This is great. You must live in the same city I do...I've seen several of these postings you mention. Thanks for a good laugh!

Anonymous said...

Wow. Great site. Just found it and I think it's hilarious!! It made me run over to my own craigslist and look for funny posts. Here's my favorite:

Maria said...

Okay, I can hear the neighbor lady turning up the TV so she doesn't have to listen to my hysterical laughter.

One of the best blog posts ever.