Couch

"Do whatever you want with it!"






A new day has dawned. The shackles are gone. I suffer no restrictions, save the limits of my imagination.

Do. Whatever. I want. With it.

Bring it to Peter's barbecue next week, set it ablaze and toast marshmallows in its oily smoke?

If that's your thing.

Teach it to speak English in order to have conversations which will enable me to learn whether it is as stupid as it is ugly?

If you're patient enough.

Wave it in front of vampires to see if it has the deterrent power of a cross, garlic or holy water?

Nothing's stopping you.

Invite guests over, whom I've been meaning for years to phase out as friends, seat them in it, and accomplish my goal without so much as a "we need to talk . . ."?

No problem.

Banish it from my sight forever?

Do whatever you want with it.