Thursday, February 19, 2009

Lean Ground Beef 5 pounds

These may be our favorite posting category: Unwanted, partially used perishables. Appetizing!

I bought one of those large rolls of lean ground beef at Cala Foods for around $12 a few days ago. I don't like this meat not really being a beef eater

I'm not big on meat, but thought I'd buy it in great quantity anyway.

but don't want to throw it away.

I'd hate to waste something I hate. And remember, it's only a few days old. Meat doesn't go bad, right?

I have a little less than half left.

You can still see where my fingers dug into the pile of meat and separated out the half I used. It's "lived in" - the gastronomic version of a dusty, foreclosed home, with children's toys fading in the sun in the overgrown backyard.

I also have the meat loaf I made with it I don't want either.

Make that "super-lived in." I'm not a very good cook. In fact, I can't bring myself to eat my own cooking. But you're welcome to my poorly prepared meal made with, by-now-days-old used meat. You do know how meatloaf is kneaded together, right? I don't think there's a molecule in here that doesn't have my fingerprints on it. Watch out for the occasional hair. Once you've eaten it, we'll be like family.

You can feed it to your dog perhaps?

If you're not interested in being like family. And hate your dog.

It was made with a little quaker oats and tomato sauce, (no salt or spices).

I told you I was a bad cook. Your dog likes tomato sauce, right?


Have we really come to this?


Anonymous said...

Hey guys - I heart your blog, but why not provide links to the actual CL posts upon which you are providing such brilliant commentary?

Stephen said...

Good question, and we even have an answer! CL posts have a very short shelflife - they expire in a week or two. We don't want the blog to be a cemetary of dead links. That's also why we download the posts' pictures and repost them ourselves, instead of hotlinking them.

Postcard said...

I think this is the most disgusting thing I have ever read.