Friday, September 5, 2008

Enema Kits

"Free - - - 7-8 Fleet Enema Kits. These are unopened but have passed their expiration date. They will still do the job."

Yeah, this is too easy, so I won't say too much.

Numbers. First, I am really beginning to wonder about the job our schools do. Too many people are being left behind in math class. If the Free Stuff section has taught me something, it's that any counting task above 2 is an insurmountable challenge. This happens so much, we need a new tag for it. "How many enema kits do I have? Honestly, I'm not sure. There are a few, several, some. Bring your neighborhood mathlete and maybe we can nail it down. My son was just visiting on Labor Day break from Cornell. He thinks it's 7-8. I have to take his word for it, he's a sharp kid."

Past expiration date. The manufacturer exhorts you not to use these. They have gone bad. But what the hell does the manufacturer know? Hell, they just want you to buy more enema kits. It's for your ass, not your mouth, right? Is your ass picky? I didn't think so. Asses make do. Take the enema kits.

"They will still do the job." What job is that, poster? Oh, enemizing, ass-flushing, thanks for the image. I come to the internet looking for a free couch, and I'm forced to think about enemas. The internet is dangerous.

Unopened. Thank heaven for small favors.


Jenny / Yard Sale Bloodbath said...

Oh my god. This post literally made me LOL several times. Ack!

I love your blog...

FreshHell said...

Free Grass Clippings:

SeaDub said...

O. so. good. My eyes teared up.

Enema Bag Kits Suppliers said...

I agree, the enema bag is a must! I found a site that sells a bucket, which I love more than the bag. This site treats cancer patients, but let's your order at a amazing price. Just sharing