Sunday, March 1, 2009

Vegetarian Packets

"I have some vegetarian awareness packets if anyone wants them to distribute."

Won't someone think of the children? They must be warned - the vegetarians walk among us. To stay vegetarian aware, know this:

"Keep your eyes open, beware the pallid and thin-skinned."

"They refer to themselves as 'your fathers and sons, your mothers and daughters.' Don't be fooled. They are not like us. They are vegetarians. God's mortal enemies."

"Beware the vegetarian agenda. They are recruiting to their ranks"

"They try to portray vegetarians as victims, not as aggressive challengers."

"They seek to make their victimizers look bad, and to get funds from corporate America."

"The vegetarians use tactics that are remarkably similar to the brainwashing methods of Mao Tse-Tung's Communist Chinese -- mixed with Madison Avenue's most persuasive selling techniques."

Vegetarian awareness. Now and forever.


Yes, of course, we know, by "vegetarian awareness packets," the poster means pamphlets encouraging people to become vegetarian. But . . . really? To hand out to friends and colleagues? To be the crazy guy on the corner exhorting the heathens - electively and gratis? Come on.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Maybe someone is looking for vegetarian promotional packets but just doesn't know where to find them? I don't see anything wrong with offering them away on Craigslist.